rikke_leonhart | Fic: The Prettiest Girl In The Band

Title: The Prettiest Girl In The Band
Pairing(s): Ohmiya, gen
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Do. Not. Own. Unfortunately.
Wordcount: 1,506
Summary: Backstage after filming one of their shows, chaos ensues. Featuring A no Arashi, snarky Nino, Grown Up!Sho, Oblivious!Ohno and Fuming!Jun.
Author's Notes: Crack crack crack crack. I don't even want to know what caused this. For trivialaffair, because your drabble rocked. Shame this one doesn't make sense.

*
“And you’re saying that you could do it better?”

“That’s not what I said,” Jun rolled his eyes. “I just said that she wasn’t working her heels very well.”

“It might not be that easy,” Nino said, arching an eyebrow. “How do you tell anyway? To me, it looks good as long as they can remain standing.”

Jun sighed. “Seriously, she looked like she was walking on poles. Very high poles. That didn’t look good. She had no balance whatsoever.”

“Be nice to our guests,” Nino scoffed. “She can’t help it, I bet. And I bet you can’t do it better yourself, either.”

Jun didn’t look inclined to answer. His lips tightened to a thin line. “I never said I could.”

“Perhaps not,” Nino agreed. “But, if you feel good enough to criticize someone else, you must be pretty damn good.”

Jun’s eye twitched.

Aiba entered the room, Ohno in tow. “Hey guys, guess what-”

“What did you do to Oh-chan?” Nino interrupted, looking sharply at Aiba.

The tallest Arashi looked floored. “Nothing bad, he’s not injured, I just-”

“Good,” Nino said and in swift movement leaned forward, grabbed Ohno’s hand and tugged him down on the sofa next to himself.

Aiba didn’t mind much that he was being ignored. Nino did so most of the time anyway whenever Aiba mentioned something about experiments. Actually, Nino got a very distant look in his eyes, sort of they were glazed over whenever Aiba started talking about anything even remotely related to A no Arashi.

“So, Jun-kun, where were we?”

“I’m NOT discussing this with you, Ninomiya,” Jun snapped.

“What aren’t you discussing?”

Nino looked positively gleeful. “Well, I’m so glad you asked, Aiba-chan, because Jun-kun said that-”

“-I DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING!!!-”

“-he could work heels better than our guest did.”

“Heels?”

“Yes, Aiba, heels. Like, on a shoe. Only thirty inches. At least.”

“Aahhhh~ Ne, Jun-kun, why haven’t you ever showed us that?”

Jun groaned.

Nino smiled sweetly and let his hand, the one closest to Ohno, slip under the older man’s t-shirt. Ohno didn’t even as much as flinch when the cold fingers met his skin on his back.

“Jun-kun, you should show us.”

Aiba jumped up from where he had sat down on the floor. “That’s a great idea! A no Arashi!”

And for once, Nino didn’t get a distant look in his eyes. He looked ecstatic.

“Ne, Oh-chan, do you think Matsujun can walk elegantly in high heels?”

Ohno blinked. Then he looked at the pissed-looking Jun. “Yes.”

Jun looked as if he didn’t know whether to be relieved at the support or pissed at Ohno’s assumption.

Nino’s eyes narrowed. “You think?”

If Ohno heard the warning in Nino’s voice, he ignored it. However, chances were that he didn’t notice at all.

Ohno smiled at Jun, who had decided to welcome all kinds of support he could get. “Yeah, Jun is good at everything he wants to do.”

“So,” Nino egged him. “You’re saying that he wants to wear high heels?”

Ohno shook his head. “No, just that if he wants to prove something, he can do it.”

The magician sighed heavily, knowing that Ohno did have sort of a soft spot for their youngest member. Shame. He’d have to work on that later.

“Okay, so let’s do this.”

Jun banged his head repeatedly on the table in front of him.

*
“A no Arashi~!” Aiba squeaked excitedly, hitting Ohno with his arms as he flailed. “Sorry, Oh-chan.”

Nino glared at Aiba. “The ‘don’t-hurt-Ohno’ rule is valid all the time, not only with experiments.”

Aiba bravely ignored Nino. “So, today we’re going to find out whether or not Jun-chan can walk in heels. And be fierce.”

“What are you doing?” Sho’s voice interrupted as he entered the room. “What the…don’t tell me one of you own these shoes.”

“Not shoes,” Jun snapped, “they’re stilettos.”

Nino snorted. “Yes, I’m sure you’re improving your situation right now.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Jun snarled.

“No, thank you,” Nino declined with a grin.

Ohno shuffled over and squeezed Jun’s arm.

“Sho-kun, we’re glad you came, you can help us decide whether or not Jun-tan can walk in these monsters,” Nino said while trying to ignore that Ohno had left his side.

Sho raised an eyebrow. Then he looked at Jun and shook his head. “Matsujun, really?”

Jun was practically frothing at the mouth.

Nino was smirking so much Aiba found it scary. So he diverted his thoughts. “Now everyone, let’s see if Matsujun can walk!”

Jun blinked and took several steps forward and back again.

“SUCCESS!” Aiba shouted. “I KNEW IT!”

“Aiba-chan, he wasn’t wearing the stilettos,” Sho reminded their hyper bandmate. He picked the said stilettos and held them out for Jun to take, which he did, only to stare at them.

He sighed resignedly and sat down, whimpering, although he looked significantly happier when Ohno crouched down to help him put the horrors on.

Nino scowled. “Alright, alright, that’s it, get away from Oh-chan!”

Jun and Nino glared at each other. Ohno looked confused.

“He’s helping me!” Jun shouted.

“I DON’T CARE!” Nino yelled back and started in Ohno’s direction, but Sho intervened and grabbed him around the middle.

“Let the children play,” Sho said soothingly. “You’ll get him back, don’t worry.”

They looked at Jun, who had resumed trying to get his feet into the shoes, and then they watched as Ohno without warning threw his arms around Jun when the younger one failed.

“Why is no one hugging me?” Aiba suddenly wailed.

All movement in the room ceased. They all stared at Aiba, who grinned sheepishly.

“Sorry?” He offered.

Jun used the diversion to try to get to his feet, Ohno grabbing his arms to steady him. “They’re not my size,” Jun complained.

“I bet you don’t even have a size,” Nino muttered.

“Ninomiya, I’ll kill you. Loudly, slowly and messily.”

“We don’t want blood the floors,” Sho reminded them.

Nino looked disappointed, but brightened considerably when Ohno stepped away from Jun to allow him to stand on his own. Nino snatched Ohno’s wrist and pulled him closer.

They all held their breath when Jun took a staggering step forwards.

Aiba snickered. “It’s stilts!”

Sho fought the urge to laugh. And Nino…well, Nino was preoccupied with trying to get his hand down Ohno’s pants.

“Nino,” Sho hissed. “Look, will you?”

Nino snapped his head up. “Ah. Well done, Matsumoto-san, you haven’t fallen yet. Congratulations.”

Jun might have had a biting retort on the tip of his tongue, but as it was, he used all his focus on staying vertical. He took a few more successful steps before he turned around and straightened his back completely.

Aiba suddenly laughed. “Ne, Riida, come here!” He snatched the oldest man in the band away from Nino, who whined, and pushed Ohno next to Jun. Unfortunately, Aiba pushed too much.

It set off a chain of reactions. Jun, of course, fell. Sho tried to prevent it, but ended up tripping over the stilettos.

Ohno fell, too, but Nino was already on it. Ohno looked vaguely confused as to how he ended up on the floor next to the human pile. Nino kept switching between petting Ohno and looking murderously at Aiba.

Aiba was horrified. Perhaps more horrified at the prospect of facing Nino. “The ‘don’t-hurt-Ohno’ rule is still in place?”

Nino clenched his fists. Aiba prepared to flee. Nino, however, realized that he had Ohno in his grasp.

Sho helped Jun get the stilts off of his feet, all the while Jun bitched about having swollen ankles.

“I hope you’re happy now,” Jun spat in Nino’s direction.

Nino leered. “Ecstatic.”

“Now, it’s your turn,” Jun snapped back. “I’d hate to be the only one with a handicap.”

“Not me,” Nino sing-songed. “Make Sho do it!”

And Aiba wasted no time in getting Sho’s very male feet into the shoes. Sho didn’t even try to resist. Smart boy, he wasn’t a Keio graduate for nothing.

“Besides,” Nino continued to Jun, “Aiba-chan has a permanent handicap, so don’t worry about that.”

Nino grinned to Aiba, who thought it best to agree with Nino for the time being. “And really, blame him, it was his idea to actually have you walk in those heels.”

Jun switched his deadly gaze to Aiba. The forces of evil scared Aiba even more than Nino did. A lot.

“I’m so sorry,” Aiba wailed, launching himself at Jun, who wasn’t fast enough to get away. Nino rejoiced in hearing the undignified squeak from Jun when Aiba made his landing, completely on top of their youngest, covering his face.

Nino took this development of the situation as his cue to launch himself at Ohno. Ohno didn’t complain, anyway, when Nino practically devoured him.

And while his bandmates were preoccupied, Sho walked gracefully out of the room, the high heels securely fastened on his feet.

He never noticed a pair of lips turning into a smug smile as the door closed behind him.

*
/End.

AN: A HUGE thanks to Suvi for reading this through and AG APPROVING it - couldn't have done this without you <3
The Senses are just about done, I just realized something about them, so I have to work that out before I can post the ehm, last two pieces. I'm actually going to miss the, they've brought me lots and lots of new friends <3
New project may be coming up, depends on what Suvi says to it, soon. But I think it's safe to say now, that it's an Ohmiya fic (like, d'uh) and it's an AU. My FIRST AU in Arashi-verse D:

Love you lots, all of you :)

Current Music: T-raz - Ich Weiss Es Klingt Verrückt

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

dthnhi.livejournal.com

Crack at it's best?
I enjoyed this very much. Arashi + highheels... PWUAHAHA
and all the Ohmiya-moments~. I enjoyed this so much. Great filler in between the senses serise!! lD

I am looking forward to your new project also!! \o/

From:

we must go, we must go

Fic: The Prettiest Girl In The Band

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